Confidence is the ability of knowing your skills and capability of doing something. This is one of the primary blocks that helps in building a successful life. However, developing confidence in self doesn't come so easily. It requires a great deal of patience, practice, perseverance and above all, a positive outlook.
When we talk about kids, then theirs is the right age to build up confidence so as to attain success in all their future endeavors. In absence of confidence, they will remain confined to their comfort zone, all through their life, without trying to look at other possibilities and gaining excellence in whatever they do. It's very important for kids to develop this quality. But again, they will need your help in this process of acquiring self-confidence.
How Confidence helps the Kids
A confident kid is more likely to succeed in life as compared to a child who never even got to understand what confidence is all about. There are several ways confidence benefits your child, some of which are:
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Confidence makes the child competent, that is, the child overcomes his fears and always makes an effort to try out new things.
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It helps him in understanding his true potentials and skills.
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Confidence also helps him in gaining everyone's trust.
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It helps them communicate to all in a better and fruitful manner.
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A confident child develops a positive outlook and thus does things in the best way possible.
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When confident, your child tends to enjoy life and grows into a mature and happy adult.
Developing Confidence in Your Kids: Steps You Should Take!
1. Learn to coach, not control: Very importantly, as a parent, you must understand that your primary role is to support the kids. You will have to give them the space and freedom to learn. Keep a watch on what they learn or do, but never be a controller. Teach them the skills and ways to handle things, and use your experience to guide them the right path.
2. Admit the limitations: No child is same, everyone differs as a human being. If your child is very good at speaking, he may not be that perfect when it comes to writing. He can be a great sports player, but may lack the skills needed to be a stage performer. These differences will be there, it's you who will have to make an effort to accept the limitations. Don't push your child into doing something he may not be good at or lacks interest. If you do so, the child will not only fail in that, but will even lose interest in other activities thinking of the failure.
3. Don't run after perfection: As explained in the above point, every child comes with different potentials and talents. You can't expect kids to be perfect in everything. Give some space to your child and let him do things the way he likes. If you stop imposing perfection on him, he will surely do things in a better and impressive way.
4. Encourage and praise their efforts not the end result: Your child scores 'A' grade in all subjects and you certainly are a proud parent. You always praise the grade he gets, but have you ever considered the efforts he puts in. Do you realize what will happen if only the end result is focused? When as parents you only think of the final result and judge it either as a pass or fail; kids tend to lose their morale. They will start fearing that if they happen to get 'B' instead of 'A', you will stop loving them. This, however; should never be the case. Irrespective of the result, make a point to praise your child's genuine efforts. And once you do that, he will apparently be encouraged to improve the next time.
5. Allow them to make mistakes: Who doesn't make mistakes? We all make mistakes, even after being grown up. So, kids making mistakes is nothing to fuss about. If your child spills the milk from his glass, does a mathematics problem wrong or fails to keep his toys and books in the right way; don't just start yelling. Instead, approach with a different and positive way to make your child realize the mistake and correct it for future. If he spills the milk, tell him how it makes the place dirty and teach the way to clean the mess. Same goes with the math sum as well; show him the right way of doing it and give examples if needed. You will have to allow them to make mistakes so that they can learn things in the right manner. Just be a guide and give your help when needed.
6. Give them tasks: The fear of failing is what keeps people away from doing things. Don't let that happen to your kids as well. Involve them in different activities as per their skills. If your child is good at arranging his book shelves or toy boxes, assign him the task. Even if he makes a few mistakes, just ignore. Once you praise him and give him responsibilities, he will feel good about himself and make every attempt to do it finely. At school too, make sure he takes part in different activities without worrying about winning or losing. Participation should always be encouraged.
7. Develop Positive Attitude: Nothing can work unless your child has a positive approach to life and things around. Always encourage him with good words such as 'You can do it', 'You have the skills in you' etc. When they will feel positive from within, they won't fear failures.
8. Never draw comparisons: Parents often tend to compare their kids with other children around, which is not a part of good parenting. When you compare your child with other kids, you are actually making him feel inferior. Never use words like 'Look at him, he is so good at maths', 'Why can't you be like him?'. Your child may not have the necessary qualities like the other kid, but you don't have to point it out. Look for the good things he has and try to enhance them.
Help your child live with a confident attitude so that he is able to take on the challenges life throws at him without any fear or uncertainty!