Sorry may seem to be a very simple word but it has great meaning and is one of the strongest pillars of positive behaviour. Apologizing for one’s wrong behaviour or any act that hurts another person reflects humility, modesty and compassion.
When it comes to kids, they must be taught the art of apologizing right from a tender age. During the growing years, kids can be shaped and moulded the way we want. This lays the foundation for the personality they develop in future. And if the foundation is strong, the future is always going to be bright. Don’t think that your child is too small to understand terms like forgiving, apologizing or sorry. It’s true they will not understand the deeper meaning but if taught the right way, they will make an effort to learn the importance of it.
Here check out some effective ways of teaching kids to apologize or say sorry.
1. Help them understand the term
Before you teach them to say sorry or apologize, first make sure you teach them what exactly these terms are and why they must use them. Tell them why it’s important to apologize when someone’s feeling gets hurts because of their action or words.
2. Make them understand a good & bad behaviour
Kids must be made to understand what a bad behaviour is and what is counted as a good behaviour. Tell them by small examples; like- when they help their classmate or a friend, it’s a good act whereas when they fight with other kids or hurt anyone, it’s known as bad behaviour. Make them understand that as good behaviour gets praised, bad behaviour is always criticized and if they indulge in anything that can hurt someone, they should always seek sorry.
3. Don’t force it
Your child must develop this habit on his own, every time you can’t force him to say sorry. This can in fact make him stubborn and he may never apologize with a pure heart. It can even develop ill feelings in his mind. Never try to force it upon your child. Give him the needed space to understand things and explain to him in a calm manner.
4. Show them the power of apologizing
Even elders feel that saying sorry is the sign of one’s weakness. However, the fact is that it takes great courage and a big heart to accept one’s mistake and apologize for the same. This shows that the person is indeed very courageous and righteous. Teach your kids that saying sorry actually is the sign of powerful people who learn from their mistakes and never repeat it again.
5. Be prepared to take the lead
If your child picks up a fight with his friend or a neighbour’s child, don’t yell at him or punish him in front of other people. Instead, stay calm and apologize on your child’s behalf. Talk to your child and get a clear idea of things once you are at home. Explain to him or her politely why such kind of behaviour was unacceptable. If you handle things wisely, your child will surely respond back in a positive manner.
6. It’s okay to apologize just to end some unnecessary fights
Many times it happens that siblings fight for some or the other reason and often put the blame on each other. Even kids at school do the same. If you happen to be in such a situation wherein you don’t exactly know as to who is at fault, it’s better to go the neutral way. Explain it to your child that situations that can get worse or give rise to further conflicts must be ended quickly. And the best way to do so is by apologizing. It’s okay to say sorry even if you are not at fault. It will at least bring peace and calm your mind.
7. Always praise their genuine efforts
When you teach them the art of apologizing, see to it that their genuine efforts are recognized and praised. However, don’t compensate this by giving them any gift or other materialistic thing. Simple words like, ‘You are a good girl/boy’, or ‘You are mamma’s favourite child’ etc. will do wonders.
8. Don’t let them use it as a tool
Often kids are seen escaping out of a situation merely saying Sorry when they don’t even mean it. You will have to see to it that kids don’t use this word as a tool. Teach your child that sorry must be said when they actually feel sad about their behaviour and realize that they did something wrong. Also, apologizing means that such a behaviour won’t be repeated again.
9. Practice what you preach
Very importantly, before you teach the child, you must bring this in your habit as well. Your kids learn what they see you doing. If you happen to make any mistake, be it the smallest of ones, don’t hesitate to say sorry. Even parents must say sorry if they happen to raise their voice on each other. When your kids see you apologizing for your mistakes, they are bound to follow suit.
It is sure to be little difficult in the beginning but not impossible. With the right guidance and constant monitoring, you will see your kids understanding their actions and taking responsibility!